The support I wish my family had.
I only remember bits and pieces of my diagnosis, yet… almost everything. January 15, 1989.
I had been sick for several weeks. It was five months after I had the chicken pox. I was licking my lips, creating a ring of chaffed raw skin around them, gulping water and wetting the bed. I remember dashing to the nearest water fountain at the ER after sleeping an hour the night before I was admitted.
I watched Sesame Street’s “Big Bird in China” twice. My dad’s company sent a bouquet of balloons that had ice cream on it. I tried (and loved) Lorna Doones for the first time.
I also hated being wheel-chaired out to the car at discharge. I wanted to rip out the IV every time I needed to use the bathroom; dragging a companion type pole with me was not cool. The gift shop was down the hall. I wanted everything. It was decorated for Valentine’s day.
What I don’t remember is what my mom remembers. Or what my dad was thinking when he went to work everyday while I was still admitted. I think about the scenes of my hospital stay at diagnosis, picturing the bedside table, the homemade cards taped to the wall from my kindergarten class. The metal crib next to me I used to hide under to try and escape yet another injection. I remember all of that, at barely six years old, recently out of a near coma.
What my mom remembers was “being a basket case.” Shaking of fear, worried sick about today and my future. Thirty three years later she can still to this day, tell when my blood sugar is low. A mom just knows.
“I wish I would have that kind of support you’re giving families.” She recently said to me. What she remembers is feeling alone. So disconnected, so afraid, yet so eager to learn and feel confident in making day to day dosing decisions and more.
Now that I am a mom, I feel like families share their diabetes diagnosis story as if it’s a birth story. Becoming a mom was transformational, and the most life altering experience I have had thus far. Receiving a diagnosis of a chronic condition like type 1 diabetes is life changing, you have no idea what you are doing, the mental load of managing it without a break is constant. But we do it.
I am here to tell you that having diabetes does not get easier over time, AND I am here to tell you that with the right support, you learn to trust yourself, your child, and build the best family unit with a sidekick like pet that follows you around for life….diabetes.
If you are feeling discouraged, disconnected, newly diagnosed with diabetes, I am here for you. I am here to offer you the chance to get ahead of feeling defeated, and feeling like you wish you had that support. Join me on a small group journey to kickstarting diabetes in the butt.
Click here to learn more and apply for the Brand new Beta Bootcamp, a chance to connect, learn, and feel better about diabetes at the start.
